Growing Up Isn’t For Everyone (Capacity Pt. 16)
If there’s one thing I’ve learned from watching TV, well, one thing I’m going to discuss now, it’s that growing up isn’t for everybody. I mean look at all those poor kids who just didn’t pan out as adults. Age is a bitch. That’s the truth that TV has taught me.
Ok, think about it, take your favorite cast of childstars and ask where the hell are they now? Hell, look at your yearbook and ask where the hell are they now.
But, maybe it’s not all grim, some wunderkind grow up to be quite spectacular although not necessarily in ways that they had imagined. Take for example the undisputed king of the Kaiju – Godzilla – you think he always wanted that life? No. Godzilla’s probably sitting around going, “Where the hell is my cul-de-sac under the sea?” I mean, as a little tyke, Godzilla probably just looked up and saw a gleam of light from something. It wasn’t the sun it was something else and wanted to see where the light was coming from. Then one day, some bottomfeeding bastard of a sea creature was like, “what, you’ve never seen a sub before?” And, poor Godzilla was like “no, where do those come from? Are those like sharks?” Before you know it, Godzilla gets to talking to the rays and eels and shrimp and whatnot and learns a bit about people, their technology and how to avoid nets. Godzilla also gets to hearing what the other creatures were saying like how an atomic bomb created a monster. And Godzilla is all like, “I’m not a monster and when I get bigger, I’m going to leave the sea and visit the big city. I bet they’ll love me there.” And well, you know how the story goes after that but see, growing up isn’t for everybody. Wait, being young kind of sucks too. TV hasn’t taught me shit about how to deal with anything. Fuck you TV until next week or next season or whenever the hell you have some real answers for dealing with life.