Charge You Later


This too shall not pass. Never found a break ever stolen or given away. Time is a concept wasted on me. Eternity is safely kept while moods shift through a situation which remains the same.

State of mind never changed the state of the state. The images remain the same on the other side of the glasses’ frame, the eyes’ lenses. The unbiased camera.

For certain, I look for confirmation. I just wish it wasn’t so easy. I was hoping I’d have to walk for a hundred miles.

*

The sweetest thing my mother ever said is, “we’ll all die some day.”

*

Hedonism comes with fine print and asterisks.

*

I’ve only got myself to blame. This lousy body that pushed on when doctors counted it out from the start but mom said, “We can do this. Now give me my boy.”

Maybe she didn’t say that but she was stuck with this body too. Once again. On the outside. On the other side of the womb.

*

What is this world coming to that hasn’t already come?

*

Shut up. Sure, why not? Whatever I say to me sounds good enough for me.

*

Where’s the line? The limit? The border?

Where’s the intersection? The cross section? A place where endings meet?

*

Nobody ever loved me more than the one stuck with me and that’s how it should be I suppose. But how much did she love me? I hope the bar was set high. Of course, there’s been no competition anyways.

*

Do you remember when you didn’t grow out of that phase?

Do you remember me? No, me neither.

*

We were all someone different at some other point in time.

What lucky souls we all were back then.

*

How many times did you have to apologize for breathing?

Did your mom teach you how to take up as much space as possible just to combat the tendency to shrink and to ward off the attacks of minimizing?

Did you learn more ways to fight off fading? To erase the eraser.

Did your mom teach you everything you needed to know to be secure in your lack of masculinity?

*

Did everybody else attempt to change that?

*

If I ever got a break it was only for commercials. There’s always something else to be sold. That’s what friends are for. Family are always around to pawn your old self on you. And strangers, well, they’ll see what you’re willing to take and charge you later.

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